Yes, you CAN!

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13

It started out as a normal weekday morning. I was getting ready to wake up Buddy and the rest of the kids to drop him off at preschool. I had a whole list of things to accomplish for the day. 

But I knew that my plans and my sanity were about to be drastically tested when Buddy came running into my room with that sudden look of terror on his face as he frantically cried the words this mother never wants to hear, "mommy, I think I'm going to throw up!!!!" 

And so began one of the longest weekends of my life!

If you know me at all, you know that I can handle pretty much anything when it comes to common sicknesses, boo-boos, accidents, etc. I grew up as the number one babysitter for three much younger siblings, I was an elementary school teacher where I was exposed to all sorts of crazy kid sicknesses, and I am now the mother of four young kids. So I am basically tough as nails when it comes to blood, stitches, bumps, and bruises.

But vomiting...that's a whole 'nother story, my friends. I have never been able to handle vomiting. Neither my own or that of others.

I had suspected that our family would be unavoidably exposed to more germs this year since Buddy was starting preschool. I knew it would be inevitable that he'd bring home a few more illnesses than normal. But I naively hoped and prayed that the one thing we'd manage to avoid would be the infamous stomach flu!

But here it was...end of August. The virus I'd pretty much rather die than get. 

Buddy spent the entire morning running between my lap and the toilet. I must say that I am grateful he has such an ability to know when he's going to be sick and always makes it to the bathroom just in time. I never had to clean up a mess and I am very grateful and relieved for that!

The other kids showed signs of feeling a bit more puny than normal but nothing terrible. Let me tell you, I was literally praying my heart out that this stomach virus would be confined to one child - the good, little tidy vomiter! I could handle that.

Evening came, Mr.Fix-it came home, I kept dinner very bland (crackers & soup for all...just in case the others got it. I didn't want to be cleaning up anything other than crackers & soup if you get my drift) and then we bathed & tucked in four kids who all seemed to be feeling better. 

And then it happened. The all too familiar churning, burning, and rumbling of my own stomach. Surely not, I thought. I'm having "sympathy" pains. It's all in my head. Everyone knows mothers cannot get sick!

I fought it for hours. I laid on my left side. I laid on my back. I took small sips of ginger ale. I took deep breaths. Heck, I even googled "how not to vomit" and I am not even kidding. I swallowed. I prayed. I took a few more sips of ginger ale.

But then my body outwitted my stubborn intentions and there you have it ladies and gentleman, this mama experienced the worst stomach bug sickness since I can even remember. 

I.have.never.felt.so.sick.

If I've ever doubted Mr. Fix-it's commitment, I take it all back now as I was greatly humbled when he himself cleaned up my own sick mess because apparently I am not quite as tidy of a vomiter as my 4 year old. 

But nevertheless, he had work commitments the next morning and a not-so-sympathetic company of which he works for, so I was left to somehow manage to pull myself off the floor and tend to the needs of my 4 small kids.

Now I am sure that there are plenty of other mothers out there who have been deathly sick while taking care of their own brood of kids without any back-up help but this is the first time that has happened to me. And I thought I was going to die!

If I've ever felt alone before, I definitely felt it now! My poor grandparents offered to "ding-dong-ditch" some soup & crackers at the front door but that's as close as they were coming to a home plagued with the stomach flu. 

So I drug out empty cardboard diaper boxes and markers and tape for my kids to play with and begged them to let me rest. I settled arguments from the couch, reprimanded them with my eyes closed, and gave free access to tons of cartoons on the Disney channel all while quoting over and over in my head the verse I leaned as a child from Philippians.

I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. 

I must say that I am grateful for the years of scripture memory growing up because these words of wisdom I memorized as a child have come in handy now as an adult mother of four small kids! I can't tell you how many times familiar verses have helped me through some of my most challenging circumstances.

This has only reconfirmed and encouraged me as a mother to memorize and re-memorize scripture with my own children now. It's sometimes the only thing that pulls you through.

Mr. Fix-it did end up coming home that day a little earlier than normal but only to quickly come down with the virus himself. He spent much of the evening on the bedroom floor, poor guy.

I am grateful for nap time, a large can of powdered Gatorade mix, kids who are creative enough to entertain themselves for a few hours, and countless episodes of Jake & The Neverland Pirates. I am also thankful for a God who fulfills His promises that we really can do all things through His Son who strengthens us.

Because He did strengthen me and got me through the dreadful 24 hour stomach bug with only a messy house but no casualties of war. :)

And none of the other kids became sick either which is probably the biggest blessing of all. Plus, we got a little extra time with Mr. Fix-it that we wouldn't have ordinarily had otherwise if he had not come down with the virus, as well.

So yes....yes you can do it, sweet reader! What ever your circumstances may be or however hard life is at times, or whether you have a single person to help you or no one at all, you CAN indeed do it. It sure helps if Christ is your strength! 

I'm happy to report that everyone is feeling on the mend now. And that God is good...all the time!

Happy Labor Day! 

. 

When You Feel Invisible

"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." Psalm 46:1.

It's nearly ten-o-clock at night. I can hear the boys shuffling around in their bedroom above me. Boo is already sound asleep, I am sure. Corky is impatiently waiting in her room for her Daddy to get home from work so he can tell her goodnight. But it looks like it's going to be another long night for Mr. Fix-it and Corky will be nestled into dreamland long before he makes it home, even though she's fighting it.

My oven stopped working tonight, right as I was about to pop my casserole in it for tonight's dinner. You see, evening time is the most stressful in our home. The kids are always whiny and hungry, I am always busy in the kitchen, and Mr. Fix-it never makes it home to sit with us at the table for dinner. Do you have days like that?

So I attempted to be productive earlier in the day and made my casserole ahead of time so that all I had to do was bake it right before the kids awoke from their naps. I was trying to eliminate the typical mass chaos of our evenings which typically begins at dinner time and lasts until baths are over and the kiddos are finally in their pajamas. THEN all of the sudden they are the cutest, sweetest, giggliest kids to be around. But I still put them to bed anyway! :)

Anyway, the oven never heated although it was emitting gas fumes every time I tried and retried to turn it on....which means there is probably something wrong with the igniter thingy. Which I know nothing about. And yes, Mr. Fix-it does but he hasn't been home before dark in over a month now and I don't think he's going to feel like tinkering with a stubborn oven at midnight.

So I have a cold, uncooked casserole in my fridge and I will pray over that darn oven again tomorrow evening and hope for the best. Skillet chicken fajitas will be my back-up plan.

But for tonight, I loaded up 4 hungry, whiny kids into 4 different car seats and headed to Chick-fil-A to purchase dinner we can't really afford and don't really need.

As I was driving, I managed to tune out the typical chitter chatter (and yes, fussing, fighting, and crying, too!) that fills the van and took some time to think. Some time to process. Some time to.just.breathe.

Because honestly, life is hard. And for me, life can be very lonely. My job as a wife and a mother has been hands-down the most fulfilling calling of my life. But it has also been the most exhausting, most overwhelming, and most lonely calling at times, too.

You see, I'm an introvert. Big time. And I have just a handful of sweet friends who are usually all busy with their own lives. Doesn't it just seem that everyone is just BUSY all the time? And my sweet husband works his tail off for our family, but bless his heart, he certainly doesn't want to stay up and talk after a 14 hour work day. And I can't blame him for that.

And our church is tiny, and I don't see any of my siblings, and my parents aren't involved, and Mr.Fix-it's family isn't particularly close-knit either, and did I mention that I am a big time introvert who has yet to introduce myself to many of the neighbors on our street? Major fail.

Because I am busy, too. All the time. Aren't we all? It just seems that everyone is always so busy. Too busy for friendships, conversations, cups of coffee, emails to check in, phone calls just to say hello, visits just to let them know you care....everyone seems so busy for any of that. And I have been terribly guilty of the same.

But let's face it, motherhood can be lonely. You spend the entire day tending to the pressing needs of your chubby-faced children and caring for all other aspects of the home and family (plus an outside job for the career mamas out there) and at the end of the day you just feel exhausted and sometimes so very alone.

And some women are truly blessed to have more mentors, more babysitters, more friends, closer family members, and nosier neighbors than other women have. (although every woman has their own struggles of some sort) I'll be honest, I secretly envy all you mothers who have lunch or coffee dates with friends or ladies bible studies to go to, or whose Mom will drop by to watch the kids just so you can have "me time" (what the heck is "me time" anyway....you're speaking Greek to me!) or Friday date nights with your husbands - because those things are just not available to me in this season of my life. Surely there are some women out there who, like me, sit at their computer in the stillness of the night and wonder why it's just the same five people who like all of your Facebook posts! :) Where oh where did my social life go?

But you know what, it's in these moments of stillness - these quiet days of no phone calls, or friends to rush off to see, or family visiting, or emails to read, or people to "vent to" - when it's just YOU because everyone else is busy, busy, busy.....those are some of my most precious moments alone with God.

Honestly, I believe that the Lord is teaching me so much about relying on Him during times of trouble - whether it's financial trouble, motherhood stress, feeling alone or abandoned by your family, snubbed by a friend or church member, or one of many other relationship issues, etc. These frequent moments of being alone and troubled are times that the Lord is most near.

Because HE is enough! Believe it or not, I can personally vouch that our Lord is enough to meet our needs and quench our thirsts and calm our troubles. I have witnessed this personally time and time again. Yes, we are still human and having others to fellowship with is sooo important (and I am prayerful that more of those opportunities will arise for me as my kids get older and I don't feel so trapped at home as much) but for such a time as this, I am marvelling in the greatness of my God - who sees little ole' me all alone in the stillness of the night. He sees me and my imperfections, and my past mistakes, and my future sins. He sees me and my desires, and my needs, and my worries, and my fears, and every piece of my heart...

He sees ME, even when I feel invisible!

So if you're like me, and the world isn't always full of lots of people to surround you and help you carry the burdens of life or cheer you on or if you wonder how someone can have 32 flippin' likes on a picture of their cat for crying out loud and your pictures of your adorably mischievous children get scrolled right over, (I kid, I kid....but seriously....) then take these moments of loneliness, open up God's Word, and allow Him to completely fill you with His guidance and His goodness.

Girlfriend, you are NOT invisible to Him!

And then, find a way to bless someone else. Stretch yourself out of your comfort zone, step away from the constant busyness of your own life for a moment, and search for some other lonely mother out there who is up to her neck in piles of laundry and hasn't seen a hair brush all day - and find a way to let her know you care, and that everything is gonna be alright! :) Because I'm betting there are plenty of other lonely mamas out there who could really use that!

And now a picture of my adorably mischievous bunch of kids because who wants a blog post without a picture?? ;-)

Be blessed! Because I sure am! xoxo

Wordless Wednesday

Wordless Wednesdays

Wordless Wednesdays

A Sentimental Post: My Not-So-Little Boy!

Lately I've been a little more nostalgic than usual, especially when I look at my not-so-little boy.

My first born boy - there's just something about that. He is growing up way too fast lately. 

I just want time to slow down!

We've decided to send Buddy to a Christian Pre-k for the upcoming school year. This is something I battled and prayed over in my Mommy/teacher heart for a while.

I love the idea of keeping him at home making lesson plans and conducting my own little school for him. We've been doing this for the past year or so, though things became a lot less structured once Baby CJ arrived. I feel a little guilty about that.

I have a Master's degree in Early Childhood Education, so I know I am capable of teaching him everything he needs to know right now. I'm also pretty intent on being in control (as much as possible and for as long as possible) of his academic experiences. 

I want my kids to experience an individualized, Christ-centered education. I won't settle for mediocre.

Plus, I feel that it is the parents' responsibility to teach and train these little blessings we call our kiddos. Of course, this process will look different for each family.

With that being said, Mr. Fix-it and I are prayerfully discussing how to educate our children in the coming years. 

Homeschool? Christian School? A combination of both, perhaps? Public School? (and I must add that we do in fact live in a great county with great public schools of which I taught in and loved dearly before becoming a stay-at-home Mommy)

The decision is still to be determined. 

And we have some more time to decide. God will guide us, just as He has in many other decisions in our lives - both important and trivial.

But today, today we have decided to send our energetic, inquisitive, headstrong, fun-loving, playful and social little 4 year old to a Christian preschool owned & directed by a wonderful lady I've known for years. 

He will be in very capable & loving hands. He is so excited! And I am excited for this new season in his little life.

I remember my young days of school with fondness - and I pray he will build friendships, skills, and memories that will last a lifetime, too. 

This big boy of mine loves to draw! And he's getting very good at it, if I do say so myself. 

He's a perfectionist like his Daddy, and he gets so frustrated if he accidentally colors outside of the lines, if his paper gets even the slightest wrinkle in it, or if his drawing doesn't turn out exactly as he envisions. 

He insists he's the one to say prayers for us at every meal, leading the family in a blessing where he also asks God to make his sisters behave. Haha! He also prays over every family member's minor boo boo or headache.

His faith in God is so child-like, such an example of what faith should be. Such an example to me!

So as I sit here on my bed while Buddy snuggles beside me watching his cartoons while the rest of his siblings nap, I thank God for him. 

I look over at him and smile a bit as I remember how much he's grown. How many days I wondered which one of us would survive his terrible twos (no joke). How much he reminds me of a little man, now. How much I count on him in ways I don't even realize. 

One day he won't want to snuggle and watch cartoons. Soon enough he won't beg for crayons and paper and then spend an hour intently working on a new drawing to proudly show his Daddy when he gets home. In a blink of an eye, he won't be so little anymore.

He's starting school in less than a month! And even though it's only for 3 half days a week and even though it's only Pre-k...I still am going to be a little sad. And I'm going to miss having my boy around all the time.

Because time flies by way too quickly! And I'm trying to soak up and hold on to every precious moment!

God has entrusted me with four beautiful little creations and I am honored for this opportunity to be their Mommy - to train them up in the ways they should go, so that when they are older, they will not depart from it! (Proverbs 22:6)

Today, I am simply thankful!

Weekend Recap: The Things I Do to Get Out of Cooking!

Have you noticed that I've been blogging more frequently lately?

Yep, that means Mr. Fix-it is pulling 70+ hour work weeks again.

That leaves me with lots of extra time on my hands after the kids go to bed.

So my house is super clean this week from my late night vacuuming escapades and I'm blogging more. Lucky you! ;)

On Friday, Mr. Fix-it called to let me know he was going to be late again. It was almost the kids' nap time and I still had to squeeze in my "dreadmill" workout. And I hadn't had a chance to put our dinner in the crock pot yet. 

And then I remembered that it was Cow Appreciation Day at Chick-fil-a (which just happens to be the kids' favorite restaurant) and that if you dressed like a cow, you could score free food!

Um, yes please!

So I laid the kids down for their naps, did my work-out, and then sweatily threw together 5 cow costumes with a little black construction paper, masking tape, and black paint. 

Wala!

I'm not usually very creative but when it comes to getting out of cooking AND scoring free food, well this Mama can come up with anything! ;-) Resourcefulness at its best!

One lady looked down at my cow-dressed brood and exclaimed, "Oh wow, you have a HERD!" hahaha

And since I have to eat, as well. I sucked up every ounce of pride in me & decided to become a cow for the evening, too.

Ya know, there's just something about dressing like a cow when you're in the middle of a weight loss journey after birthing 4 back-to-back babies and you still have 20 pounds to lose. Just not good for the self-esteem. Haha

But for my kids & for free food, I guess I can do it.

Ok, so I ditched the construction paper cow ears pretty quickly. Slightly blurry photo courtesy of my 4 year old photog.

The kids had a blast. We all ate for free. And they even traded their kids' meal coloring books in for free ice cream cups. 

It just can't get any better than that! It's all about the memories in this home. ;-)

Happy Monday!